minds, metaphors and (ethical) manipulation
Posts tagged change
How does Instant X-Ray Listening actually work?
Aug 16th
I recently tested a new approach to coaching: offering instant, short (30 minutes max) phone or skype sessions to anyone whose thinking was “stuck”.
Many thanks to everyone who helped me trial the idea. It seems people certainly valued being able to get inexpensive help, from their own home.
Most clients got the breakthrough they needed very quickly. For example, Lesley Lyle said: “Ten minutes into the conversation and Judy had put me in touch with the things which had seemed like thoughts just out of my grasp. Whispy thoughts that have turned into simple, practical tasks that I just need to get on with. Judy, thank you so much, one simple session has cleared my head and allowed me to see the light.”
I had no doubt that my clients would get dramatic results: it’s been my experience for so long that I’d be shocked if that didn’t happen. I knew I’d enjoy the work and want to do more of it (read on if you’d like to book a session).
What I’d failed to realise was that people who didn’t know me or my work would need to be convinced that such rapid change was even possible. And once they were convinced More >
How to make someone feel really bad (and why you might want to)
Jul 5th
This article describes one of the easiest ways to make someone feel really bad. Read on for more details.
The fact you’re reading this means you’re probably a nice person at heart, and a ‘people person’. You probably love to make people feel good. Warm smiles and infectious laughter are what people expect from you. And because people feel good when they’re with you, they want to spend time with you.
But sometimes, even you need to make people feel really bad. Sometimes, you just want to!
That bad feeling can be one of the most effective ways to motivate someone to change: to change their unhealthy habits, to ditch something that makes them unhappy, or to buy your product or service to solve their problems.
People may like the idea of going for positive goals, but in fact real action (and spending) is often more strongly motivated by our desire to avoid discomfort. Remind someone of the distress their problems are causing, have them feel that real-life pain, and they are much more likely to buy your solution.
David Grove, the inventor of Clean Language (on which this technique is based) called the deepening of pain “drawing the arrow back” – the further the More >
